the message that was never sent.

During a series of messages with a gentleman, discussing our views on homosexuality (of course, he was was for and I was against), the conversation eventually got to the breaking point. While I felt strangely calm (and I really do mean that -- typically I have quite the adrenalin rush going), I could feel the essence of tension and rage from the other side of the computer.

The conversation ended by me being labeled as a "child", a "condescending bitch", a "rude, ignorant bigot" and a "disgrace to the Christian society", which I was not the slightest bit surprised about. Those comments always occur and I've learned to cope with it to a degree. What saddened me though, was that I was unable to send one last message. Though none of my other messages sent to him were the least bit aggressive, the last one couldn't come across that way even if somebody tried to pick out something that could potentially sound offensive. I spent over an hour writing out the message and praying about it. Finally, after it was finished, I clicked the "Send" button and quickly realized I had been blocked from sending him anymore messages. Though it took me a while, I have come to realization that God had a purpose for my message not being sent. I may not know that purpose, but I can rest knowing that there was a purpose. And I'm okay with that.

Let it be known: The following message you are about to read (assuming you stick around) is not posted in hopes that the gentleman will read it. This is not meant to be perceived as indirect gossip as we see so many times on Twitter and Facebook. In fact, he has no idea that I even have this little space. I am posting it because first of all, I have prayed about it and God wants me to, and secondly, it will be closure for me. Since I was unable to send him the message, I am posting it on this little space of mine.

Here you are, the message that was never sent:
"I assure you, my purpose is not to prove you wrong. As much as you're convinced it is, it isn't. :) If my genuine purpose was to type out everything for the mere purpose of that, why should I even label myself "Christian"? My priorities would need serious reevaluating. I will tell you this though, my purpose used to be to prove people wrong (about a year ago). That's a fact. I wanted to feel superior. It was a pride issue. My heart has changed since then though. Now? I simply want one to have an open mind and an open heart. I want each person to be able to take in what the other is saying (speaking in general), even if they still cling to their own view. If they happen to change their view, that is awesome. If they don't, that's okay too. At least the person and I were able to respectably agree to disagree and we were open to each other's views. Whether you believe that or not…well, that’s up to you. I know my heart though. My reasoning in telling you about Leviticus was simply to explain the difference in why the laws are different now from then. Honestly, the laws can get quite confusing because it's important to know which laws were in use and which ones we are still told to follow. I only wanted to help explain. I definitely didn't intend for you to feel like you were being verbally attacked.
I know, too, that pointing out sin sounds extremely harsh. In the end though, it's a beautiful thing. When we as Christians see clearly the baggage in a fellow Christian's life (not just a "person", but another Christian), we are to point it out. Why? To lead them back to Christ. It's not to make them feel or look stupid or to come across as terrible people. It's to communicate and hash around the sin, acknowledging it as sin, something that they struggle with, but something that they can conquer. All sins are equal, whether it's greed, gossip (one of my struggles), homosexuality, adultery, murder, etc. There is no age limit on pointing out sin either. It depends on where you are in your walk with Christ. If you are sinning yet feel the need to point out somebody else's sin, you first examine your own sins and repent of them. You are right, I am still a child...but I am a child of God and because I am a child of God, it is my duty. Is it my only purpose in life to go around pointing out sin? Absolutely not. But if I feel that conviction of "Talk to them and help them", then yes, I will point out the sin. I have messed up and done it before examining the baggage in my own life though. I'm a sinner. I mess up. Is it right? No. But after I feel that second conviction of "You need to take the plank out of your own eye", then I accept the fact that "I am sinning and I need to repent" (though it is not easy. In fact, I struggle with that as well). This is the difference in the Scripture you used vs. the one I used: The one you quoted above has to do with God being the ultimate judge. It isn’t saying that we as Christians should not (rightly) judge, but saying that God is the ultimate judge (as in, He decides what happens for our sins). The Scripture I quoted, however, explained that we as Christians are to hold each other accountable and point out sin when appropriate (to those INSIDE the church; not outside).  Again, I am saying this not to insult your intelligence, but to clear up any confusion.

You are absolutely right; I am a hypocrite. All Christians are. Why? Because we sin. There is no earthly being that is perfect, because we were all born into sin. That's where the beauty comes in. God loves us so much that he continually strives to bring us back to Him, leaving us repenting and seeking forgiveness. Unfortunately, because of human nature, we tend to turn away a lot of the time when he tries to pull us back in. But he doesn't give up on us. It's amazing, really. He wants us to turn away from our sins. Will we ever be able to completely turn away from all sin? Unfortunately not; not until we have all passed on. But we can keep repenting, fighting our sin and coming back to Christ."


  1. I have been in the same boat with a lot of people here recently. I need to work on not coming off so strongly, I really don't mean or intend to but I defend what I believe as a Christian but I need to pray for patience.

    1. You worded that perfectly, friend! As I have learned the hard way, coming across too strongly will only make the opposing side perceive what you're saying as arrogant and angry. You should definitely stay firm in your argument (no need to sugar coat the opposing side's), but composed and collected at the same time. Praying for patience helps tremendously. When I start to type, if I can feel myself raging inside, I shut the laptop, give myself a breather, and pray for God to write through me (weird as it may sound) and reply when I am calm again.

  2. Defending what we believe is so hard sometimes. One thing that I've had to remind myself of is don't let an idiot drag you down to his level, because he will beat you. So many times I want to go back and send a hateful email that clearly states my case, but there is no point. Like you said, sometimes the messages that are never sent are closure just for us. Thanks for posting this...it was amazing. xx.


I do love comments!